Reason #382 I love being a stripper.

Tonight started out slow, and it stayed that way. There were three more new girls. I did four dances all night long, and by the time last call arrived I was sooo ready to hole up in the van with a good book and go to sleep.

Of course there’s this thing between last call and actually leaving called cashing out.

Different clubs charge strippers differently. At some clubs, it’s a flat fee that you pay to work, usually $20-100. Often it’s free or reduced if you’re ready to dance when they open. Other clubs charge a fee per dance, or a percentage of dance money. This club usually charges $5 per dance. During the height of season they’ll sometimes charge a house fee, plus $5/dance, plus $5 every time you go on stage, plus whatever else they can think of. But that’s okay, cause at that point I’m making great money and don’t mind paying out.

There was a new doorguy (dance counter) tonight. He marked me down for ten dances. His logic being that if I was in the dance room for any part of a song, then I had danced that song. For example, if I walked my customer into the dance room towards the end of a song, sat and waited for the next song to start before dancing it, and then got dressed and walked out of the room as the next song was starting, his logic would state that I’d done three songs. The manager fully agreed with him, but said she’d give me a break just this once and only charge me for five. I told her I’d done four and I’d pay for four.

Then she hit me with a five dollar per stage set fee. I was like, “dude, there weren’t more than four guys at the stage at once all night. You want me to pay for that?” Yes, she did.

So I paid for my dances, paid for my stages, tipped out the bartender, DJ, waitress, and counting-impaired doorguy. I did some calculations and realized that I’d paid out over a quarter of what I made.

I got my stuff out of my locker, got my outfits back from a girl who’d borrowed them, and got my music back from the DJ.

I’ll go back in a week or two when season kicks in and the money to bullshit ratio is righted.

Now… the possibilities are endless. I could go work in the big city, or the big little town. I could just go visit family or friends. I could go someplace totally new and see it. Or I could fly down to the lower 48 on a hot tip about a club down there. The possibilities are wide open and endless.